When I got pregnant, everyone and their mother asked if I had a diaper genie on my registry.
When it comes to babies, people are very opinionated. It’s completely irrational, as this baby can be wildly different than that baby in temperament, size, preference, and so on. However, people are completely convinced that they know best.
A swaddle helped their baby start sleeping through the night at two days old, so a swaddle will be the magic wand of sleep for the general baby public. By the way, there’s no way on planet Earth your child started sleeping through the night at two days old. You’re fooling no one.
The diaper genie is the universally desired baby product that everyone wants to buy you for your shower. If it’s not on your list, you’re going to get one anyway. Our turn to hop on the diaper genie train came around recently. Not ones to buck the trend as first-time parents, the diaper genie was one of the first items on our registry.
It was with us for two short months before I marched it down to our doorman for disposal. The diaper genie is overhyped, unnecessary, and quite frankly, incredibly unhygienic. Think about it: it’s a canister full of old, compiling human feces. It smells awful, it’s nauseating to clean, and if that baby gets in there, good luck.
Here’s a tip to save you time, money, and your good health. The next time someone suggests a diaper genie, give them a wink and just nod knowingly as you say, “Oh, yes, the Diaper Genie.”
Lilly Holland is a former New Yorker turned suburbanite who writes about parenting and her former career as a teacher in an elite NYC private school. She can be reached at Lilly.firstname.lastname@example.org.